Standing in the hallway of my new school, on a break during a professional development day for new teachers, I listened to the nurse navigator as she relayed the news “you have cancer... I know you’re starting a new job and have limited time available, so I set up appointments with a surgeon and an oncologist for after school...” I called my husband and knew there were others to call, but I needed to get back into the PD session. I returned to the classroom and went through the motions for the remainder of our day while in my mind asking “why me? Why now?”
And then the self-judging took over. I compared myself to others, and I continued to ask why this was happening. I don’t smoke. I don’t drink. I run half-marathons. I eat nutritious foods. I lost 50 pounds in 3 years and maintain a healthy weight. I go for my annual check-ups. I am healthy and I feel better than ever. Why me?
Instead of trusting that it was all part of the plan for my life, I let fear rule, and I judged myself and my journey. It’s easy to do, and difficult to stop. I’ve been thinking more lately about judgment and ways and reasons for releasing it. Releasing judgment is an ongoing process, one in which I cycle in and out.
When we judge ourselves, we bring more stress and suffering thinking we’re not doing enough, being enough, etc. We “should” on ourselves, telling ourselves what we should or should not do. Judgment comes from fear, a fear that we are not worthy, but we are worthy. By surrendering ourselves to a higher power, we can find inner peace and freedom from judgment.
How do we release judgment?
What happens when we forget to do these things? We avoid dwelling on the negative or the fact that we believe we've fallen off track. We acknowledge it, accept it, and move forward, forgiving ourselves and releasing judgment.
And then the self-judging took over. I compared myself to others, and I continued to ask why this was happening. I don’t smoke. I don’t drink. I run half-marathons. I eat nutritious foods. I lost 50 pounds in 3 years and maintain a healthy weight. I go for my annual check-ups. I am healthy and I feel better than ever. Why me?
Instead of trusting that it was all part of the plan for my life, I let fear rule, and I judged myself and my journey. It’s easy to do, and difficult to stop. I’ve been thinking more lately about judgment and ways and reasons for releasing it. Releasing judgment is an ongoing process, one in which I cycle in and out.
When we judge ourselves, we bring more stress and suffering thinking we’re not doing enough, being enough, etc. We “should” on ourselves, telling ourselves what we should or should not do. Judgment comes from fear, a fear that we are not worthy, but we are worthy. By surrendering ourselves to a higher power, we can find inner peace and freedom from judgment.
How do we release judgment?
- We understand that we don’t have all the answers.
- We remain flexible and open-minded, accepting of ourselves and others.
- We change our language and avoid dwelling on our mistakes.
- We practice compassion and remember that compassion and judgment cannot co-exist.
- We remember that we can't always believe what we think, especially about our need to be right.
- We value individuality and uniqueness.
What happens when we forget to do these things? We avoid dwelling on the negative or the fact that we believe we've fallen off track. We acknowledge it, accept it, and move forward, forgiving ourselves and releasing judgment.
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| #ChooseJoy |
